Best Life Therapy Blogs - Grief, Anxiety, Stress & More
- posted: Jun. 28, 2025
Blog post written by Emily Albright, LLMSW, Clinical Mental Health Therapist at Best Life Therapy
A lot of people are talking about something called neurodivergence right now. Thanks to social media, more people are starting to learn what it means. Neurodivergence is a word used to describe people whose brains work in ways that are different from what’s considered “typical.” Some people who are neurodivergent have ADHD or Autism, but there are many other conditions too, like Down Syndrome, Dyslexia, or Tourette’s Syndrome. There are all kinds of brains in the world, and each one is valuable.
I want to be clear — this is not a blog blaming people’s struggles on their diagnosis. Instead, it’s about recognizing how the world around us, and how we experience emotions inside, can sometimes be really tough for people who are neurodivergent. Those hard things can cause trauma.
Trauma is what happens when a person goes through something deeply upsetting, scary, or overwhelming, and it affects how they feel and think about the world, sometimes for a long time after it happens. Trauma doesn’t always come from huge events. It can also build up from smaller, repeated experiences like feeling left out, misunderstood, or treated unfairly. Any situation that causes a person’s sense of safety or security to be threatened, including emotional safety, can lead to trauma.
Before I dive deeper into this topic, I want to introduce myself. I’m a 29-year-old woman with ADHD, and I’m also a clinical social worker. That means I help people deal with their emotions, mental health, and life challenges. This topic matters to me because it’s something I experience both in my personal life and in my work with others.
This is the first post in a three-part blog series where I’ll talk about how trauma can show up in the lives of neurodivergent people. I’ll break it down into three important areas:
- External factors — things in the world around us, like school, work, and how people treat neurodivergent individuals.
- Internal factors — how people experience emotions and process events differently because of how their brains work.
- Ways to heal and cope — tools and ideas for managing trauma and supporting your mental health as a neurodivergent person.
In this first post, I’ll focus on external factors — things in the world around us, like school, work, and how people treat neurodivergent individuals. To do this, I will break this down into three categories: Facing Hurtful Treatment and Unfairness, Feeling Misunderstood and Left Out, and Living in a World That Wasn’t Built for You.
Facing Hurtful Treatment and Unfairness
Sometimes, people are unkind to others, especially when they see someone as “different.” This can show up in many ways — like making rude comments, leaving someone out, bullying or harassing them, or even hurting them physically. These kinds of experiences can cause trauma, especially when they happen over and over again.
This kind of mistreatment doesn’t always happen one-on-one. It can also happen on a bigger, community or society level. This is called systemic discrimination. It means that unfair rules, policies, or systems are put in place that make life harder for neurodivergent people.
For example, some labor laws or job policies might ignore the needs of neurodivergent employees. If there aren’t options for flexible schedules, quiet spaces, or important accommodations, it can create stressful environments. Requiring everyone to work long hours without breaks or in loud, open offices with bright lights can lead to sensory overload, increased stress, and harm to mental health.
Schools can have similar problems. Some school policies might require students to sit still or make eye contact when talking to a teacher. For many neurodivergent students, this can be very difficult or uncomfortable. If a student can’t follow this rule, they might get in trouble, even though it’s not something they can easily control. A fairer rule would give students options to show respect and stay engaged in a way that works for them, like letting them fidget, look away while listening, or take short breaks.
Another issue is societal stigma. This happens when negative beliefs about neurodivergent people are spread through movies, TV shows, or social media. A common example is the way people with Autism are often shown as either a “genius” with superhuman abilities or as someone who is dangerous, cold, or completely unable to connect with others. These stereotypes are harmful because they ignore the wide range of personalities, emotions, and abilities that real neurodivergent people have. They also lead others to believe unfair and untrue ideas, like assuming every person with Autism must be a genius or emotionless.
All of these things, whether it’s bullying from a person, unfair treatment from a school or job, or harmful messages in the media, can cause trauma and damage a person’s sense of safety, self-worth, and belonging.
Feeling Misunderstood and Left Out
Another big challenge for neurodivergent people comes from misunderstanding and communication differences. Neurodivergent people are often misunderstood, which can make them feel left out or ignored. Most of the time, people are not trying to be mean on purpose. Instead, they simply don’t know how to communicate well with someone whose brain works differently than theirs. Because of this, they may misinterpret how a neurodivergent person thinks, feels, or expresses themselves.
This issue is explained by something called the Double Empathy Problem. It means that when two people experience the world in different ways, it can be hard for both of them to understand each other. Many people assume that neurodivergent people struggle to connect because they miss social cues or react differently. But the truth is, neurotypical people also have a hard time understanding what neurodivergent people are going through. It is not a one-way problem. Both sides can struggle to connect because their brains process the world differently.
Because of these misunderstandings, neurodivergent people often face overwhelming social expectations that they struggle to meet, simply because others don’t understand their needs or ways of communicating. This pressure can lead them to “mask” or hide their true selves to fit in, which causes stress and can add to trauma over time.
When these misunderstandings happen often, neurodivergent people might feel like no one truly gets them, which can be lonely and frustrating. Others might make wrong assumptions, like thinking someone is rude, lazy, or too sensitive, when really, they are just different in how they communicate or respond to situations. These repeated misunderstandings can cause emotional pain and trauma over time.
When people learn about the Double Empathy Problem and how differently brains can work, it can help them become more patient, accepting, and willing to meet others where they are. True understanding should go both ways.
Living in a World That Wasn’t Built for You
Finally, many of the challenges come from environments and systems designed without neurodivergent needs in mind. Most schools, workplaces, public places, and even rules are designed with people who have “typical” brains in mind. This means that the needs of neurodivergent people often get overlooked or ignored.
For example, many places rely heavily on loud announcements or crowded hallways, which can be overwhelming. Some environments expect everyone to respond quickly in conversations without time to process thoughts. Others might have strict dress codes or sensory-unfriendly uniforms that make some people uncomfortable. These kinds of expectations can make it very hard for neurodivergent individuals to feel at ease or succeed.
Being in spaces that are not built for your brain can feel exhausting, frustrating, and even unsafe. It can wear you down to have to constantly hide or “mask” your natural way of being just to fit in or avoid trouble. Over time, this kind of pressure can cause real emotional harm and trauma.
Besides the physical spaces, many neurodivergent people also face a lack of access to important supports, like therapies, accommodations, or community programs that could help them succeed. When routines are unpredictable or environments don’t consider their needs, stress builds up and the risk of trauma increases.
Final Thoughts
The world can be a tough place for neurodivergent people. From unfair treatment and harmful stereotypes to confusing social rules and environments that ignore different needs, these external factors can cause real emotional pain and trauma. It’s important to understand that these struggles aren’t caused by someone being “broken” or “wrong,” but by a world that wasn’t built with everyone in mind.
When we learn about these challenges and talk about them openly, we can start creating safer, more welcoming spaces for all kinds of brains. Change begins with awareness and every small step matters.
In the next post of this series, I’ll focus on internal factors, how neurodivergent people experience emotions and stress differently, and how that can shape the way trauma affects them from the inside. I hope you’ll join me as we continue this important conversation.
If you or someone you know could use some support, Best Life Therapy has openings and we'd be honored to support you. We believe in kindness, acceptance and inclusion. Visit our website to learn more about our therapists. Select the therapist you'd like to work with, view their calendar and reserve your appointment, https://bestlifethrapy.net. Questions, call 810-771-3457 or use the contact form on our website.
- posted: Jun. 28, 2025
Blog post written by Emily Albright, LLMSW, Clinical Mental Health Therapist at Best Life Therapy
A lot of people are talking about something called neurodivergence right now. Thanks to social media, more people are starting to learn what it means. Neurodivergence is a word used to describe people whose brains work in ways that are different from what’s considered “typical.” Some people who are neurodivergent have ADHD or Autism, but there are many other conditions too, like Down Syndrome, Dyslexia, or Tourette’s Syndrome. There are all kinds of brains in the world, and each one is valuable.
I want to be clear — this is not a blog blaming people’s struggles on their diagnosis. Instead, it’s about recognizing how the world around us, and how we experience emotions inside, can sometimes be really tough for people who are neurodivergent. Those hard things can cause trauma.
Trauma is what happens when a person goes through something deeply upsetting, scary, or overwhelming, and it affects how they feel and think about the world, sometimes for a long time after it happens. Trauma doesn’t always come from huge events. It can also build up from smaller, repeated experiences like feeling left out, misunderstood, or treated unfairly. Any situation that causes a person’s sense of safety or security to be threatened, including emotional safety, can lead to trauma.
Before I dive deeper into this topic, I want to introduce myself. I’m a 29-year-old woman with ADHD, and I’m also a clinical social worker. That means I help people deal with their emotions, mental health, and life challenges. This topic matters to me because it’s something I experience both in my personal life and in my work with others.
This is the first post in a three-part blog series where I’ll talk about how trauma can show up in the lives of neurodivergent people. I’ll break it down into three important areas:
- External factors — things in the world around us, like school, work, and how people treat neurodivergent individuals.
- Internal factors — how people experience emotions and process events differently because of how their brains work.
- Ways to heal and cope — tools and ideas for managing trauma and supporting your mental health as a neurodivergent person.
In this first post, I’ll focus on external factors — things in the world around us, like school, work, and how people treat neurodivergent individuals. To do this, I will break this down into three categories: Facing Hurtful Treatment and Unfairness, Feeling Misunderstood and Left Out, and Living in a World That Wasn’t Built for You.
Facing Hurtful Treatment and Unfairness
Sometimes, people are unkind to others, especially when they see someone as “different.” This can show up in many ways — like making rude comments, leaving someone out, bullying or harassing them, or even hurting them physically. These kinds of experiences can cause trauma, especially when they happen over and over again.
This kind of mistreatment doesn’t always happen one-on-one. It can also happen on a bigger, community or society level. This is called systemic discrimination. It means that unfair rules, policies, or systems are put in place that make life harder for neurodivergent people.
For example, some labor laws or job policies might ignore the needs of neurodivergent employees. If there aren’t options for flexible schedules, quiet spaces, or important accommodations, it can create stressful environments. Requiring everyone to work long hours without breaks or in loud, open offices with bright lights can lead to sensory overload, increased stress, and harm to mental health.
Schools can have similar problems. Some school policies might require students to sit still or make eye contact when talking to a teacher. For many neurodivergent students, this can be very difficult or uncomfortable. If a student can’t follow this rule, they might get in trouble, even though it’s not something they can easily control. A fairer rule would give students options to show respect and stay engaged in a way that works for them, like letting them fidget, look away while listening, or take short breaks.
Another issue is societal stigma. This happens when negative beliefs about neurodivergent people are spread through movies, TV shows, or social media. A common example is the way people with Autism are often shown as either a “genius” with superhuman abilities or as someone who is dangerous, cold, or completely unable to connect with others. These stereotypes are harmful because they ignore the wide range of personalities, emotions, and abilities that real neurodivergent people have. They also lead others to believe unfair and untrue ideas, like assuming every person with Autism must be a genius or emotionless.
All of these things, whether it’s bullying from a person, unfair treatment from a school or job, or harmful messages in the media, can cause trauma and damage a person’s sense of safety, self-worth, and belonging.
Feeling Misunderstood and Left Out
Another big challenge for neurodivergent people comes from misunderstanding and communication differences. Neurodivergent people are often misunderstood, which can make them feel left out or ignored. Most of the time, people are not trying to be mean on purpose. Instead, they simply don’t know how to communicate well with someone whose brain works differently than theirs. Because of this, they may misinterpret how a neurodivergent person thinks, feels, or expresses themselves.
This issue is explained by something called the Double Empathy Problem. It means that when two people experience the world in different ways, it can be hard for both of them to understand each other. Many people assume that neurodivergent people struggle to connect because they miss social cues or react differently. But the truth is, neurotypical people also have a hard time understanding what neurodivergent people are going through. It is not a one-way problem. Both sides can struggle to connect because their brains process the world differently.
Because of these misunderstandings, neurodivergent people often face overwhelming social expectations that they struggle to meet, simply because others don’t understand their needs or ways of communicating. This pressure can lead them to “mask” or hide their true selves to fit in, which causes stress and can add to trauma over time.
When these misunderstandings happen often, neurodivergent people might feel like no one truly gets them, which can be lonely and frustrating. Others might make wrong assumptions, like thinking someone is rude, lazy, or too sensitive, when really, they are just different in how they communicate or respond to situations. These repeated misunderstandings can cause emotional pain and trauma over time.
When people learn about the Double Empathy Problem and how differently brains can work, it can help them become more patient, accepting, and willing to meet others where they are. True understanding should go both ways.
Living in a World That Wasn’t Built for You
Finally, many of the challenges come from environments and systems designed without neurodivergent needs in mind. Most schools, workplaces, public places, and even rules are designed with people who have “typical” brains in mind. This means that the needs of neurodivergent people often get overlooked or ignored.
For example, many places rely heavily on loud announcements or crowded hallways, which can be overwhelming. Some environments expect everyone to respond quickly in conversations without time to process thoughts. Others might have strict dress codes or sensory-unfriendly uniforms that make some people uncomfortable. These kinds of expectations can make it very hard for neurodivergent individuals to feel at ease or succeed.
Being in spaces that are not built for your brain can feel exhausting, frustrating, and even unsafe. It can wear you down to have to constantly hide or “mask” your natural way of being just to fit in or avoid trouble. Over time, this kind of pressure can cause real emotional harm and trauma.
Besides the physical spaces, many neurodivergent people also face a lack of access to important supports, like therapies, accommodations, or community programs that could help them succeed. When routines are unpredictable or environments don’t consider their needs, stress builds up and the risk of trauma increases.
Final Thoughts
The world can be a tough place for neurodivergent people. From unfair treatment and harmful stereotypes to confusing social rules and environments that ignore different needs, these external factors can cause real emotional pain and trauma. It’s important to understand that these struggles aren’t caused by someone being “broken” or “wrong,” but by a world that wasn’t built with everyone in mind.
When we learn about these challenges and talk about them openly, we can start creating safer, more welcoming spaces for all kinds of brains. Change begins with awareness and every small step matters.
In the next post of this series, I’ll focus on internal factors, how neurodivergent people experience emotions and stress differently, and how that can shape the way trauma affects them from the inside. I hope you’ll join me as we continue this important conversation.
If you or someone you know could use some support, Best Life Therapy has openings and we'd be honored to support you. We believe in kindness, acceptance and inclusion. Visit our website to learn more about our therapists. Select the therapist you'd like to work with, view their calendar and reserve your appointment, https://bestlifethrapy.net. Questions, call 810-771-3457 or use the contact form on our website.
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